Totally random

Today I thought I’d use the random word generator to help get me started on this post, but once again I was given a ridiculous word – grotesqueness.  For heaven’s sake – who programmed this?  Cheerlessness; grotesqueness – are there no cheerier words to spit out?

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It’s almost the end of another summer and the beginning of what I consider to be the new year.  It’s hard to tell, though – we are having hot, sticky days and nights and it feels more like the middle of summer.  Except there’s something that makes it feel like fall is coming.  I can’t quite put my finger on it – is it that the sun is lower in the sky?  There’s a hint that leaves are turning soon?  Whatever it is, it’s making me anticipate fall and it’s making me happy. 

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On a totally unrelated subject, I heard Paul McCartney’s new single – “New” – today.  If there was any doubt that Lennon was the more talented of Lennon-McCartney, this song would surely put that doubt to rest.  Why can’t old rockers quit while they’re ahead?  

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And the last in a series of totally unrelated topics … why can’t the media finish what they start?  How many times do they get you into a story and then drop it when it ceases to be sensational so you never learn the outcome?  Why are celebrities who are famous only for being famous even news in the first place?  Do the media decide what they want you to know and who you should be reading about?  

What if?

Do you play the “what if …” game? 

I started playing “what if” awhile ago.  I mentioned in an email to a friend that I wondered what would have been different if I’d gone to graduate school.  I have wondered that off and on, although not all that seriously as I don’t regret the decision I made to not go. 

But then I started thinking more about “what if?” –  what if I’d made this decision instead of that; what if I’d moved there instead of here; what if I’d turned down that invitation; what if … any number of decisions I’ve made through the years.  There are hundreds of decisions – large and small – that have shaped my life. 

I found it amusing that shortly after I started my own little game of “what if”, the topic showed up in a comic strip I enjoy – Pickles.  Both Earl and Opal have started their own games of “what if”, with interesting results. 

It’s hard not to play “what if” – I think we all wonder from time to time what might be different in our lives if we’d made one different decision.  Or would our lives be different?  Is it fate that determines how our lives unfold – in which case no decision we make will affect the outcome.  Or do we get where we are because of a combination of our choices and happenstance?  I tend to come down on the side of choices and happenstance, but sometimes that’s not so comforting. 

Because what often goes along with the “what if” game is the “I regret” game.  This is the dangerous game.  Playing “I regret” has at some points in my life led me – and others I know – to be seriously unhappy with their present reality. Regret can’t change the past, so playing the game seems always to end in a bad place.  It’s a game I hope I’ve left well in the past, although it sometimes beckons in the midst of “what if”. 

I enjoy a good game of “what if”, but it’s also nice to put it away on the shelf and enjoy where my decisions have brought me – assuredly a different place than if I’d made different decisions, but a good place all the same.

It all sounded so good in the ad ...

We are away at a rented cottage for a week's vacation with the kid.  It's been a long time since we all vacationed together and we're having a great time.    And thank goodness we're having such a good time, because if we weren't, there would be lots to complain about with our accommodation.

Like a lot of people, we found our cottage online, through what we have known to be a reputable website.  The website made clear the cottages aren't on the water, but across from the lake.  There is a nice beach and the water is great for swimming.  There's a heated pool, wifi available in the office, satellite tv in every cottage, all the mod cons - all we had to bring were our clothes and food.

Sort of.  As it turns out, the lake is across the road and you get to the beach by walking through trees on a mulch path, until you hit the many, many stairs that take you down to a deck above the waterline.  There is a tiny strip of grass and sand that could, if you use your imagination, be considered a beach.  After you walk over many small rocks at the edge of the water, you get to the mud-and-rock bottomed lake, where you'd better swim if you don't like mud oozing between your toes and underwater plants grabbing at your legs. 

The rest is all true enough as well - I'm sure the pool has a heater but I'm not sure the heater is being used.  There's no one on site through the week, so there's also a lovely accumulation of bugs - dead and alive - floating on the top.  The wifi in the office works - sometimes.  The satellite tv works - sometimes.  Mod cons?  Well, you guess at how modern they are.

But you know what?  It doesn't really matter all that much.  We are together as a family, we are having a good time anyway and we'll have lots of stories from this place.   This place is really giving us a break from the ordinary.

The new menace on the roads

Morning walks have changed.  It’s now dark at just after 5:30 when I head out.  The morning sounds are different than they were just a few short weeks ago – fewer birds are singing and the sounds from the bushes are more ominous (rummaging squirrels?  lurking coyotes?  frightened rabbits?).  Everything is just that much less friendly because of the darkness, and this is what I will face from now until late next spring. 

The darkness makes morning sounds seem louder – it’s like sound carries further and becomes amplified.  That first morning chirp could be coming from anywhere.  Train wheels on the tracks are louder.  If the wind is coming from the right direction, cars noises from the highway are louder, too. 

What’s not louder, though, is the new menace on the roads – electric or hybrid cars and bikes.  They silently come out of nowhere and glide past without a sound.  I am so used to hearing vehicles approach that I barely look when I cross the road during my early morning walks.  Until yesterday, that is, when I almost stepped out in front of an electric bike.  That thing made no sound at all as it approached and it was a last-second, out-of-habit glance that saved me from putting a foot out onto the road. 

I know I should have been more attentive and more careful about looking before I crossed the road, but honestly, you should be able to hear these things.  Hybrid vehicles are the same – they can approach without you knowing it.  As wonderful an invention as they are, they are making the streets less safe for pedestrians who assume they will hear a car or bike approaching.  They are a menace, I tell you! 

 

So now on my morning walk, I have to watch for skunks, coyotes and electric or hybrid vehicles.  What’s next, I wonder.